Home | relationships

Tag: relationships

I Know The Plan- Guest Post by Lynnette Flatt

 “I Know The Plan.”

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans for your welfare, not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.” Jeremiah 29:11 HCSB

 

“This wasn’t the life I envisioned for you.”

My well-meaning mother spoke those words to me at the beginning of my relationship with Steve. Her words stung, but she wasn’t saying them to hurt me.

She loves me very much, and I really believe she would give years off her own life to spare me the hard and cruel lessons the world can teach.

I was raised to love Jesus and pray.

I was raised to remain a virgin until my wedding night. I was raised to do the speed limit, to eat my vegetables, and to get a good education.

Book Reviews - 20% off at AuthorsReading.com
I was not raised, at least in my Mother’s opinion at the time, to fall in love with a man who had a three-year-old and an emotionally unstable ex-wife.

My Mom’s soft green eyes looked at me with worry and sadness as she wrung her hands and listened to my latest woes and drama.

The blissful beginning that most dating couples face was soon replaced with a stressed out boyfriend, a little boy who missed his dad, and an ex whose disturbingly long phone rants would carry on during (and well past) dinner.

Sometimes the only reassurance Mom could give me was a sincere but troubled, “Honey, all I can do is pray for you.”.

Little did I know at the time that Jesus was guiding me through one of the darkest valleys of my life and he was raising me up in His OWN way.

Fast forward quite a storied, beautiful and sometimes difficult 16 years.

My Mom’s frequent and intentional prayers are felt like warm rays of light all around me. Steve and I are at a good place, a joyful place.

My Mom and Dad quickly saw the measure of the man who became my God-fearing and magnificent husband. My Mom now says, “I can’t imagine life without Steve and Keegan. My sweet Lynnette, you are blessed beyond measure.”

Earn Cash for Surveys

Sometimes our limited minds cannot understand the struggle God has purposely planted in our lives.

My friend, there is beauty in the struggle! There’s also unexpected elation, gained wisdom, and grace. We can’t comprehend with our human eyes the perfectly designed tapestry of life Jesus has planned for us.

What our loving and great-intentioned family and friends want for us might not align with what GOD wants for us.

Step-moms and step-dads, you will get a bevy of advice during this journey, some good and some not at all.

Ask for a discerning heart as you wade through the muck of good intentions. Ask the Lord for wisdom, and listen closely as He directs your footsteps. He won’t lead you astray. Your life belongs to Him, and HE envisions for you to be a beautiful story of His mercy and love.

Moment of Prayer:

“You hear my cries for help, Lord! You ease my despair. Sometimes I get really stubborn and fiercely independent in my thinking. I start out doing things my way, forgetting to relinquish the control to your able Hands. Reel me in today, Lord. You love my strong spirit but you WANT me to depend on you. You are CAPABLE of handling all of this I’m going through. I hand it all over to you, and I TRUST you.”

Individual/Group Discussion:

What “advice” have you been given by family and friends about dating someone who has a child(ren)?

What advice have you given to someone in the past concerning dating a man or woman who has a child or children?

What advice would you give them now?

□  Are you willing to turn all of your concerns over to the Lord and ask Him “thy will be done”? If so, take a quiet moment and ask for His guidance.

 

A Message from the Author:

Hello and God Bless! My name is Lynnette Flatt.

My husband and I live in Canton, GA, about 45 minutes north of Atlanta. I am a Stepmom to a wonderful 19-year-old.

We have been a blended family for 16 years.

We attend Oak Leaf Church in downtown Canton.

We love the Lord and strive to put Him first in our daily walk. Our road as a blended family has not been easy at times, but we continue to pray and love.

 

When troubles come knocking blessings are ten-fold just around the corner! We would love to contribute our experiences, blessings, trials, and encouragement to other blended families who need lifting up.

 

YOU ARE NOT ALONE! We can get through the challenges of life by listening to others and in turn guiding others.

 

Websitesunshinestepmom.com

Twitter

https://twitter.com/nettegator 

Instagram

https://www.instagram.com/lynn_flatt/

 

 

Do You Want to Stay in the Loop with Everything New from A Blended Momma?

Subscribe for FREE to the Blog’s Newsletter Below!

Discovering who you really are! Learning to live life for YOU!

 

Enroll in Embracing your Imperfect Perfectness eCourse today! 

Start living life for YOU and creating the future you deserve!

Co-Parenting planner

Grab your Copy of my Brand New, “Our Family’s Co-Parenting Planner” today for the  LOW price of $3.99!!

 

 

Like this Post? Prove it by Sharing it!

Why you Should be Documenting your Love Story and How to Start Today!!

Documenting Your Love Story

**Note: Some links contain affiliate links which  means if you purchase a product or service through my link I may receive a commission based fee off of it! This is at NO CHARGE to you EVER! Thank you for your support, I truly appreciate it!

If you are looking for an amazing way to document your love story, look no further! I’ve been looking around for a love journal and I have finally found the PERFECT printable love journal by The Dating Divas! It’s the perfect DIY anniversary or birthday gift for your husband. This amazing printable pack includes journaling prompts, gorgeous one-of-a-kind graphics, and spaces to include treasured photos.

The Perfect DIY Gift for Him

The Dating Divas is my favorite site I refer to regularly for ideas and tips to constantly be strengthening my marriage. You guys are going to LOVE them! They are bursting with marriage and date night ideas! For this love journal, they collaborated with designer Erin of Strawberry Mommycakes, to develop a modern love journal that you and your husband will love. The I Love Us book features 48-pages of beautifully coordinated designs and writing prompts. All you need to do is print and add your unique story! Documenting the what and why of your relationship has never been easier!

Take a look at what’s included in this DIY love book:

  • Introductory How-To Guide
  • Front, Back, & Spine Covers (2 Options Included!)
  • Dedication Page
  • Love Story Prompts
  • 5 Love Quote Designs
  • 6 Framed Photo Pages
  • Photo Embellishments & Caption Tags
  • BONUS Section: Quote Designs as Printable Art

All this for $12.97!

I absolutely love the bright colors and design elements included in this printable pack!

How to Create this DIY Love Journal for Him:

Recording your story doesn’t have to be tedious or time consuming. And, you don’t need to have a background in scrapbooking or graphic design to pull everything together. Nope! With this printable I Love Us book, it’s all done for you! They’ve taken all the guess work out of crafting a unique keepsake celebrating your relationship.

To get started, you will need: pens, scissors, glue, a 1-inch binder, and several cute photos of you and your sweetie. If you want to keep your pages beautifully preserved for years to come, you might consider placing them in page protectors. Erin included not just 1 gorgeous cover, back, and spine designs, but 2! Take your pick!

After you’ve placed your pages in the binder, it’s time to start journaling! Our DIY love book takes the stress out of trying to come up with the perfect thing to say. Forget writer’s block! Our pages of journaling prompts will help guide you as you record the meaningful moments, feelings, and memories of your marriage. You will be documenting:

  • How You Met
  • The What, When, Where, Who of a Special Event
  • Favorite New Years and Anniversary Memories
  • 20 Things You Love About Him
  • Favorite Activities
  • Just Because Trivia
  • And… so much more!

Once your journaling is complete, continue to personalize your DIY love book with treasured photos from your relationship. Erin created several pages of photo designs in unique sizes and layouts. The pairing of photos and your unique voice, as heard through the journaling prompts, will truly bring this DIY gift to life!

The last step is adding photo embellishments to the pages. The ribbon banners serve as perfect caption place holders to remind your spouse of shared times together. Don’t you love the cute arrows and LOVE graphics?!

Your hubby will love this walk down memory lane! He will be amazed at all the care and effort that you took to create a one-of-a-kind gift for him.

SPECIAL BONUS DETAILS!

Throughout the love journal, Erin included 5 gorgeous love quote designs. These beautiful images are one of my FAVORITE parts- they are such inspiring visual reminders of the power of love. Erin was kind enough to translate these quotes into art prints as a SPECIAL BONUS for our readers! Yep, that’s right- we’ve included a special section of 8×10 and 5×7 prints featuring all 5 of the gorgeous quotes captured in the book!

Simply print out your favorite graphics and place in a frame for instant home decor!

These art prints are amazing! Which ones should I frame in my house?

Get this entire Printable Bundle & Bonus for just $12.97!

The I Love Us book is the perfect, personalized romantic gift for him! Consider your search for the most amazing anniversary or birthday gift for your husband OVER when you purchase this special love journal. Can you imagine the look on his face as he reads through this DIY book?

If you loved this project, be sure to check out our unique printable baby album for parents-to-be! Just like the I Love Us book, this printable journal features beautiful graphic design elements, as well as guided writing prompts. All the work is done for you with both of these instant downloads!

Start documenting your love story today!

You’ll thank you, and your kids and grandkids will too!

 

Do you document  you and your spouse’s love story? How do you do it differently? Let me know below!

See these other awesome posts below:

How to be a Stay at Home Mom or Stepmom on One Income!

Get Paid Just for Being a MOM!

What Time is it for YOUR Marriage Today?

 

Like this Post? Prove it by Sharing it!

Communication Breakdown!

Is YOUR Relationship or  Marriage Hitting a Communication Breakdown

Communication problems.

It happens to the best of us!

Communication is such a weird thing, and the lines of communication can become blurred so easily, it’s almost unreal.

especially when true love and hard feelings are heavily involved. Even those who think that they are basically ‘immune’ to the conflict can find themselves in a fight over communication…real easy.

It usually happens when they least expect it, and chaos EXPLoDES!

We all need to realize just because we may be the one who handles the fight better, doesn’t mean we are better nOr “immune” to conflict.

I can remember this One specific weekend, My spouse told me something that really hurt my feelings, and I automatically lashed back in defense! (Uh-oh)

It was a silly little argument, esPEcially now,  looking back, over something as simple as a misplaced bottle of perfume. But to me, it represented something much deeper! Something that had been simmering away for a couple of weeks.

I get frustrated at having to search for something when it is not where I expect it to be! I get worse when my partner has moved it and I don’t know the first place to begin searching for it.

Perfume, a sewing needle & thread, car keys, a stupid Tupperware container LID, covers for our outdoor chairs, these are examples of items being misplaced( and not by me) and instances where I had to turn the house upside-down.

A simple location answer from my spouse when these things were moved, would have saved me a lot of time and frustration.

BUT WHEN I FINALLY got an answer, do you what answer I got?

“You need to open your eyes and organize yourself better”

I was devastated, to say the least.

When I come home from work every day, I take the dog out and cook dinner (so that it is on the table by the time my partner gets home). The house is always spotless and warm, as I’m very particular about coming home to a tidy house.

I see this as a part of my role in coming home first, and it takes a lot of my time. Not to mention I make sure my kid’s homework is done, the baby is clean and cared for, and everything is taken care of for the next school/work day!

For my partner to imply that I have the time to “organize yourself better” really hurt me!

I don’t expect his praise, but I do hope that my efforts get recognized and sometimes appreciated.

I got told that “I don’t expect you to cook my dinner every night.” I took that as ingratitude, and hurt me even more!

Where do we go from here?

My spouse felt guilty for coming home every night to the perfect household, where I felt guilty if it wasn’t perfect. It was never about me trying to make my spouse feel guilty, but it seemed like it to him.

And this is where the communication fell apart. He misinterpreted my efforts, and I misinterpreted his response.

Communication, communication, communication.

I needed my partner to keep me informed of his thoughts and feelings. I need to be informed. I need to voice my frustration before it gets to that boiling point. We both need to talk about our feelings more, and how each of our contributions to our home and our relationship makes us feel, and how we interpret each other’s contributions.

Just because something isn’t spoken about, doesn’t mean it’s not important. A relationship or marriage is not a competition, but for many couples, it feels like it.

When people feel guilt or stress, it leads them to act in funny ways. Often stress and guilt are HUGE  barriers to communication. The key to overcoming these barriers is to recognize what it is and have the courage to talk about it.

You might be able to do it as a couple, or you might want the help of a friend who can listen to the way you are communicating with each other and offer insights and advice.

Thankfully, my partner and I,  got it sorted out, and kissed and hugged. It wouldn’t hurt so much if I didn’t love him so much. But it served as a good reminder to me. Sometimes you get so wrapped up in your own emotions that you forget to think of the other person.

You also need to entertain the possibility that you are misinterpreting each other. Talking about it is the way to expose the miscommunication and let the healing process begin.

This is a good lesson to learn, even for the experts’!

************************************************************************************************************

This article is brought to you by Save My Marriage Today.
You may be making mistakes that will jeopardize your marriage recovery! My Save My Marriage Today course has helped save thousands of marriages and is guaranteed to deliver results or your money back.
You can’t afford to give your marriage 50%. You need 100% – you need the BEST information now! You have to learn what it takes to save your marriage.
Get the whole package that gives you REAL results … guaranteed.
You need to go HERE to access my course.
Why?
Because your marriage deserves better!
*************************************************************************************************************

 

Like this Post? Prove it by Sharing it!